Have You Recently Rewatched Twilight? Because Wow, I Have Some Thoughts

The Twilight Saga renaissance is fully upon us. When Twilight came out (nearly 12 years ago!) I hadn’t heard of it, but my friend brought me to see it in theaters, and 13-year-old me was SOLD. I was devoutly Team Edward, and was thoroughly convinced that Robert Pattinson would be my husband someday. Yes, I was embarrassingly obsessed with Twilight to the point where it was cringey at times. However, I happen to still genuinely enjoy watching the film. It’s been a couple years since I’ve last seen it, so I thought it would be fun to revisit a film I used to watch religiously. Without further ado, please enjoy this list of my thoughts and questions as I rewatch Twilight:

1. I forgot how (literally) blue this movie is.
2. I also forgot how bad Jacob’s wig is.
3. I’m pretty sure Bella’s excitement over getting a shitty old truck is the most emotion she shows in the entire movie.
4. Anna Kendrick is in this! Wow!
5. I like how all of these dudes are immediately going after Bella and she’s spoken like . . . 4 words to them.
6. The Cullens walking into the cafeteria is, hands down, the most Iconic scene in cinematic history.
7. LMAO Edward’s reaction to Bella walking into Biology class. Subtle!
8. The way Edward is looking at Bella is genuinely disturbing I am screaming.
9. “I’ll just . . . have to ENDURE it.” Edward is so dramatic.
10. OK, Bella is so dramatic too . . . a match made in heaven.
11. Why is Emmett like hanging out of the top of the Jeep? Who casually rides in a car to school like that?
12. I’d forgotten about the scene where they show someone getting killed by three mysterious figures. The vampire drama begins.
13. Oh, finally a civil interaction between Edward and Bella!
14. Edward’s brows are IMMACULATELY groomed.
15. “It’s complicated.” “I’m sure I can keep up.” Maybe she just doesn’t want to talk to you about her personal life, Edward. Boundaries are important.
16. I love Kristen Stewart as much as the next person but why is she so damn fidgety in this movie?
17. “It’s the fluorescence . . . uh . . . ” Honestly Edward is my hero.
18. THE ICONIC VAN CRASH SCENE YES YES YES.
19. I know that Bella questions the logistics of this whole situation but how did no one see Edward run at vampire-speed to stop the van?
20. Carlisle Cullen: an icon, a visionary – protect him at all costs.
21. What are Rosalie, Carlisle, and Edward whispering about? God, I love the drama.
22. Edward is straight up gaslighting Bella and I am not OK with it. This is emotional abuse, people!
23. Bella waking up to Edward standing in her room . . . I once found this romantic, but I now realize it’s creepy as hell.
24. Edward creepily asking Bella, “What’s in Jacksonville?” when he’s across the parking lot when she’s talking about that? Again, Edward is killing the subtlety game.
25. And then he immediately gets angry at her when she trips. Can he relax?
26. I love how they threw in Edward catching the apple to recreate the cover. So meta!
27. “What if I’m not the superhero here . . . what if I’m . . . the BAD GUY.” The absolute D R A M A.
28. I totally forgot how Jacob tells Bella the story about the Quileutes in this movie! Neither he nor Bella are aware that the legend is, well, true. “It’s just a story, Bella.” Nope, it’s not!
29. Uh-oh, someone else is getting attacked by the three mystery figures. Except now we’re finally seeing who they are!
30. Ugh, Bella getting cornered in an alley by those creeps. Awful.
31. EDWARD AND HIS VOLVO SAVE THE DAY!
32. Edward’s driving in this scene is me pulling into the McDonald’s drive-thru at 10:28 a.m. before they had all-day breakfast.
33. I know that Edward is the hero in this scene, but the man was just casually following Bella around? It’s just as creepy!
34. I used to swoon over this restaurant scene so much. Bella finally learns that Edward can read minds, but not hers. “Money, sex, money, sex . . . cat.” (The person thinking about cats was actually a personal cameo by me.)
35. I used to think the pacing of this movie was perfection but now I realize they’ve only had three conversations.
36. Bella is realizing some shit here.
37. We’re finally to the forest scene! So good!
38. “How old are you?” “17.” “How long have you been 17?” “A while.” CHILLS.
39. “I know what you are: a vampire.” (But imagine if he wasn’t a vampire and now it’s just really awkward.)
40. As much as I loved this scene, it’s striking me as kind of abusive now? He just grabs her arm and starts dragging her up the hill. Not cool.
41. YOU BETTER SPARKLE!
42. Edward talking about how much of a killer he is as he casually rips entire tree limbs off . . . Bella, sweetie, throw the whole man out.
43. Imagine if Edward and his family weren’t “vegetarians”, though, and they did eat humans? Would Bella still go for him?
44. I remember reading about how Twilight was inspired by a dream of Stephenie Meyer’s, which was the scene in which Edward and Bella lye together in the flower field. Ugh, so poignant.
45. At this point the only real reason Edward is so attracted to Bella is because he loves her smell so much. He literally just wants to drink her blood. I feel like there should have been some more development here about them falling in love for like, normal reasons?
46. “About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire. Second, there was a part of him – and I didn’t know how dominant that part might be – that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was unconditionally, and irrevocably in love with him.” Um, really? You’re irrevocably in love with him? Sis, you’ve known him for two seconds. Also, you’re literally 17.
47. Edward comparing his diet to humans living on tofu and that it’s not fulling satisfying is BS, sorry. Vegetarian and vegan diets are 100 percent sustainable Edward!
48. Bella meeting Edward’s family for the first time is one of the funniest scenes of the whole movie.
49. “Is she even Italian?” “Her name’s Bella”. LOL.
50. Rosalie straight up shatters the glass bowl, so iconic.
51. There’s constant commentary about how much the vampires all have to literally restrain themselves from killing Bella, and Bella seems chill with it.
52. It just now dawned on me that since vampires don’t eat or drink anything, they can’t drink alcohol or get drunk. And, obviously, they don’t sleep either. What the hell do they do for fun?
53. Oh, right. They listen to Debussy.
54. “You better hold on tight, spider monkey.” What?
55. When your date monkey-crawls up a 50-foot tree with you slung on their back . . .
56. Edward busting in through Bella’s window when she’s talking to her mom, and then admitting that he’s been doing it for “the past couple of months.” OK???
57. Edward can’t fully make out with Bella because he wants to kill her so bad. How did 12-year-old me not realize how bizarre this is?
58. Also, how does Charlie never hear full-on conversations and shuffling around in the room literally right next to his?
59. Edward watching Bella sleep when she willingly invites him to do so is 100 percent cuter than when he was creeping in. Glad we’re past that phase.
60. Seriously, how did I never noticed how beautifully groomed Edward’s eyebrows were?
61. I know I say this a lot, but the baseball scene is *peak* cinema. The storm. The cinematography. “Supermassive Black Hole” playing in the background. Iconic.
62. Rosalie hates Bella’s guts so much.
63. Oof, here come the bad vampires. I love this drama. Also I love how they come onto the field like they’re walking on one of those flat escalator things that are always in airports.
64. Seriously, they weren’t able to smell Bella until there was a gust of wind? The Cullens could smell Bella from the moment she came into their home.
65. God, Edward is so freaking aggressive with Bella sometimes. It’s not romantic.
66. I’ve always really hated the whole fight scene Bella and Edward simulate to give her an excuse to leave. And when she insults poor Charlie so badly so he’ll let her leave . . . #justiceforcharlie
67. Bella passing by the diner and seeing the normal kids just living life – so thought-provoking.
68. “Bella, you ARE my life now.” Again, y’all are 17.
69. I like how James threatens Bella and tells her that if she brings anyone to the ballet studio, he’ll kill her mom. Is going alone REALLY a better idea, Bella? He’s obviously still going to kill you both either way.
70. Uh-oh, Bella got bamboozled.
71. Pepper spray on a vampire. Good move, Bella.
72. The whole movie, Edward is always like, “Vampires are INDESTRUCTIBLE. INVINCIBLE. NOTHING CAN KILL US.” And then they kill James in like, .0005 seconds.
73. Edward sucking the venom out of Bella’s arm is . . . uncomfortably sexual.
74. “Death is peaceful, easy. Life is harder.” So deep, Bella.
75. They just accept that Bella simply fell down some stairs. Are y’all just going to ignore the gaping bite wound in her arm???
76. Bella wears converse to prom. Ugh, she’s so quirky.
77. Jacob just casually shows up to Bella’s prom to tell her that his dad wants her to break up with her boyfriend.
78. Ohhh, Victoria is still alive – and she looks PISSED. The perfect set-up for New Moon.
79. ? “HOW DID WE GET HERE? I USED TO KNOW YOU SO WELL” ? “Decode” is the song of the decade and that is simply objective.

That’s it! That’s the movie! Basically, Twilight is one of the most iconic films that has ever existed and anyone who disagrees can come for me. Cinematography? Amazing. Plot? Remarkable. Characters? Visionary. It has its cringey moments, but it’s such a fun and entertaining trip down memory lane. What more can you ask from a film?