Donna Kelce is breaking a new mum record: both her sons will play in the Super Bowl. The catch? They’re on opposing teams.
Brothers Jason Kelce of the Philadelphia Eagles and Travis Kelch of the Kansas City Chiefs face off in Phoenix, Arizona on Sunday, Feb. 12 for the Super Bowl LVII Championship ring. And their mum, Donna, will be there to support both of them – as equally as she can.
While she promises not to pick a side, she did admit to having a current favorite. “Right now, Jason’s a little ahead because of the grandchildren,” Donna told Entertainment Tonight on Feb 9. “But I’m sure Travis will take it over soon one of these days. I can’t, you know, as a mother, you just can’t pick one against the other. It’s 50/50 and it always will be.”
She’s so 50/50 that she’s known for rocking a split jersey with both their teams on it.
Wanting to stay neutral, Donna decided not to go to any of the playoff games, because she couldn’t be there for one game if she chose to go to the other. However, she has squeezed two games into one day before. In 2022, she traveled nearly 1,300 miles in a single day to see both of her sons play, Yahoo Sports reports. After she watched her eldest defeat the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in Philadelphia, she flew to Kansas City where she surprised her younger son after the game.
“For all the stars to align and for them to get through high school and college and the pros. And for them to both play in the Pro Bowl and to play in the Super Bowl, and then for this to happen. This is just like a dream come true,” Donna told ET. “I can’t express enough how special this is for the family and it’s just crazy.”
However, she does understand what’s at stake here – bragging rights. “Obviously, there’s going to be somebody that’s going to go home heartbroken,” she told TODAY. “They won’t have the bragging rights at the Thanksgiving table, but this is going to be an awesome event and I’m really looking forward to it.”
The Kelce’s mum is the perfect example of how to handle “fights” between siblings. But no matter what, after the game is over, one will have lost and one will have won. As the brothers ramp up for the Super Bowl on Sunday, POPSUGAR spoke with Bisma Anwar, a licensed mental health counselor at TalkSpace, on what parents can do to cheer on siblings who are competing with each other and how to celebrate one child’s win while supporting the child who lost.
Check In With Each Child Individually
It’s important to talk to both children about whatever their experience was and give them space to process. Ask them questions like: What was your experience like? How did that feel? How was that for you? How are you doing? Just make sure you’re checking in and make sure you’re supporting the child that lost, Anwar says. “And then with the child that was successful, it’s this idea of ‘that’s great, we’re so happy for you.'” She also suggests holding these conversations individually with the kids rather than collectively. Essentially, treat each child as an individual and don’t assume that they’re both having the same emotions.
Validate Each Child’s Feelings
It’s important to validate each child’s experience without it being at cost of the other child. “Every child deserves each of their experiences to be acknowledged,” Anwar says. This is also a great time to have a teaching mument. Depending on the age, she suggests different approaches. “With an older child (like teenagers), they might be sad about losing but they’ll probably want to participate in celebrating their sibling’s win.”
Younger children, however, might have a harder time understanding the concept that they can simultaneously be sad about their loss and happy for someone else’s success. Take them aside to talk through the experience. “Explain that you know it’s hard to lose, and it’s upsetting, and it’s frustrating and this is not the outcome that you wanted. But also, we have to learn to be gracious when we lose as well as when we win,” Anwar explains. Really it comes down to communication in those moments.
Emphasize That You Love Them Equally
Kids need to know their parents are supporting them because they love them. Try to have “a very unified message around it,” Anwar says. “Both parents giving that same message that ‘we’re here to support you, and we love you and we’re rooting for both of you.'” Make it clear that there’s no preference for one child over the other.
If a child accuses a parent of favoritism or says they feel like they weren’t getting the same kind of attention, don’t try to belittle it. Anwar says this often happens in families. “There might already be a little bit of that sibling rivalry dynamic,” she adds. “To a certain level, it’s healthy, because that’s just the way it is. But if a child is expressing that, then I think the parents really need to take notice and be mindful rather than just rejecting what that child is saying by shutting them down with a simple, ‘No, obviously we love you both equally.'”
Rather than being dismissive, it’s about acknowledgment, validation, and explaining it to them, Anwar says. Remind them that there’s a lesson that can be taken away from this kind of situation, even if it’s not the outcome they wanted.
Related: How to Be a Good Sports Parent and Help Your Kids Get the Most From the Game