It’s Not Just You: People Are Becoming Fussier About Who They Date in Lockdown

According to Bumble — and my single friends — people have become way fussier when it comes to dating in lockdown.

“I was talking to this guy the other day and then I realised that I hadn’t asked him if he’d had the vaccine,” my friend told me over a virtual wine the other day.

“Turns out, he hadn’t. So, I blocked him on everything! Can’t be having that negative energy.”

They’d been talking for a few weeks and were getting excited for their first “let’s go on a walk” date, but this not-so-minor question had slipped her mind.

“I think that COVID has forced us to divide in our opinions about so many things like politics, human rights, mental health. . . and it’s encouraged us to ask so many more questions in that initial stage of dating,” she told me.

COVID affects so many parts of our daily lives right now and finds its way into so many of our daily conversations, so it makes sense that you’d talk about it with someone that you’re getting to know.

Although it can feel overwhelming to be constantly talking about something so grim, it also allows for singles to get to know each other on a deeper level, quicker. Things like morals, beliefs and behaviours aren’t often something you notice or talk about initially, in a budding relationship.

According to new research from Bumble, 45 per cent of users ask their potential dates if they’ve had the vaccine before they meet up with them.

It’s actually pretty amazing to know that people really care about other people’s decisions and that they heavily factor into who they date. This may make the dating world a bit of a fussier place to be, but wouldn’t you prefer people to only talk to you if they were really into you? Imagine how much simpler dating would be.

With this new climate of transparency and awareness, people are taking their time in new relationships, with 21 per cent of people waiting longer to have sex with a new partner compared to before the pandemic.

This could be due to restrictions, having an easier excuse to take things slow or looking for more secure relationships because we all know that stability and enduring physical affection are both things we need more than ever right now.

Regardless of how we got there, it’s quite a nice move in the direction of taking online dating more seriously, going more for open conversations and longer-term relationships rather than constant one night stands.

The Bumble data agrees, showing that 12.5 per cent of people are spending a longer period of time messaging and chatting with someone online before meeting them in person.

I mean don’t get me wrong, I love a bit of no-strings sex, but it’s emotionally exhausting at the best of times and definitely right now. It must be nice to have an opportunity to give the old-school style of dating a go.

“People are definitely more into getting to know you because there’s this barrier of not being able to meet up with restrictions,” my friend explains.

“But it’s kind of nice because you can really tell if you’re going to be into someone or not after talking to them a bit more and asking them some hard questions.

“It’s more like dating and less like a fling roulette.”

Sounds relaxing, honestly.